Wednesday, November 5, 2014

The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask 3DS Announced

Holy shit....Guys...I...fucking...


My 2nd favourite game of all time, Majora's Mask has just been announced for a release on the 3DS for Spring 2015. Ever since Nintendo released Ocarina of Time on the 3DS, Zelda fans everywhere wanted the same treatment for Majora's Mask. A trailer was released and while it doesn't look as changed as Ocarina was, this is still an early trailer and may only be used as a placeholding trailer until newer footage is seen. 

Here's the announcement trailer for anyone who hasn't seen it yet.



Funnily enough, I was planning on beginning to work on the 2nd edition of Top of The Tusks, which ironically, was Majora's Mask. This announcement fuelled my excitement to talk about the game even more so expect that article very soon.

Monday, November 3, 2014

The Spooky Zone of Strangely Strangeness #1: Super James Pond (1993)

Super Mario. Sonic The Hedgehog. The Legend of Zelda. Some games are so ingrained in our collective conscience that sometimes we forget how simple they can be. 

But sometimes there are games that are so strange, so out there, that they defy all logic. They spit in the face of mere reason and stand alone as pieces of surrealistic art. These games have been locked away in time. But you can now find them again if you come with me into....

The Spooky Zone of Strangely Strangeness.




I have been wanting to talk about Super James Pond ever since I played it. Never before have I gone into a game believing that it was just going to be a fun, simple little SNES title only to have it be a kaleidoscope of sheer terror.

For starters, the game does not give you any semblance of a plot, an introduction to the story, your character, or anything. You just press start and this is what you're made to deal with it.

What? Wh....WHAT

So yeah, O.K. Just throw me into the blizzard-ing tundra with no context. No that's fine. I'm cool with it. So the titular character is James Pond, a tadpole secret agent. Get it? He's from the water and he's a secret agent so his name is James Pond. It's cute, I can't lie. But then the cuteness fades into sheer panic when you learn our aquatic amigo can do this:


Jesus Christ....what the fuck is that? Did James go back in time to Victorian era England and wear rib crushing corsets for a few years just so he could do that? What is the point of it? Why can't he just jump and grab higher platforms? Why does he have to contort his spine like some fish/giraffe/demon spawn hybrid?

The answer is the makers of this game were Satanists. That's the only deduction I can truly make.

Our Lord and Master, Beelzepond

So basically, at the very crux of everything, this game is a standard platformer where you need to get to the end of every level until you reach a boss. Pretty standard stuff. What isn't standard is what's in the levels. Like, take for instance the backgrounds.

"Jerry. What did you do with that LSD?"
"Oh...I put it in your drink. I thought you wanted it when you played that video game"
"....Goddamn it, Jerry."

What do sad, confused bears and a withered beanstalk have in common? I dunno...a metaphor for a spiral into psychosexual degeneration? Probably.

And then the items you pick up for nothing more than just points and sometimes power ups are as equally strange. They range from hamburgers, candy canes, hammers, apples, etc. The reason for these disparate elements are never explained. And finally, like a psychedelic cherry on top, you finish the level by collecting penguins. Why? Because FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY.

The bosses are equally terrifying. Take for example, the first boss, which is a giant version of the bears from the first level, as if he's their slave master and that's why they look so scared in the background.

GODDAMN IT JERRY!


Nothing much changes from this point. You get some scrolling levels here and there and you can swim underwater after falling into a giant tub of ice cream and at this point, I am no longer surprised. Finally, if you make it to the end without your last thread of sanity snapping, you beat the fianl boss and see this cunt welcoming you.



Yes, that is Santa Claus. You see, the problem with the SNES version is it conveniently decides to leave any semblance of plot to this game so you're just running around killing giant bears while collecting penguins wondering if you're really writing all of this in shit in some white padded room. According to the Genesis version which actually has a story and a introduction, here is the plot:


"The game takes place immediately after its predecessor, James Pond. Although Acme Oil Co. has been destroyed by James Pond, Pond's arch enemy Dr. Maybe survived and has retreated to the North Pole where he has taken over Santa's workshop. Dr. Maybe is holding Santa's workers hostage (in most versions of the game they are penguins, in some they are elves), and has turned many of Santa's helpers into his own twisted and dangerous assistants. James Pond is recruited to infiltrate Santa's grotto, free the captive penguins, retrieve the stolen toys for the children of the world, and defeat Dr. Maybe once and for all. This time, however, due to the greater risks involved in this mission, Pond is given a robotic suit and the code name "RoboCod" (a pun on RoboCop). This suit gives Pond superhuman strength and agility as well as enabling him to stretch his midsection almost indefinitely and reach otherwise impossibly high areas."

What? This is a sequel? There's a game where you're not able to stretch your torso in disgusting, scientifically impossible ways? What poor bastard had to come up with the plot of this? One answer I do have is, while knowing the plot now makes a lot of the stuff in the game make more sense, it doesn't make it any less horror inducing.






The Spooky Zone of Strangely Strangeness

Super Mario. Sonic The Hedgehog. The Legend of Zelda. Some games are so ingrained in our collective conscience that sometimes we forget how simple they can be. Save the Princess while platforming in 8 different worlds, be the hero of a fantastical realm while slaying all enemies with your blade and...running around places as a blue hedgehog doing whatever the fuck a really fast blue hedgehog does (I don't know, I never grew up playing Sonic. Sue me.)

But sometimes there are games that are so strange, so out there, that they defy all logic. They spit in the face of mere reason and stand alone as pieces of surrealistic art. These games have been locked away in time. But you can now find them again if you come with me into....

The Spooky Zone of Strangely Strangeness.

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Top of The Tusk #1: Final Fantasy VII (1997)


Intro

This is it. This is the mecca. To me, no matter how many decades pass since this game has been released, no matter how many innovations and breakthroughs that we see in the gaming industry, nothing has come close to surpassing this game. Are the graphics dated? Sure, but does that stop games even older than this one to cease being great? Is the story sometimes convoluted and confusing? Does it have some glaring plot holes? Yes and yes, but for my money, it's the greatest story ever told in video games.

The game is about loss. The loss of the world, the loss of a loved one and the loss of one's self. Even before the true story begins near the end of the first disc of the game, there's a overwhelming sense of sadness and the oncoming sense of doom. Perhaps it's the people of Midgar's fright mixed with hatred of the stronghold that Shinra has over them. Throughout the game, there's the feeling that there's something that no one has the power or control to stop, whether it's the big bad government in the beginning, the seemingly immortal Sephiroth near the middle, or Meteor near the end.

WARNING: The rest of this article will have major spoilers for the game, so if you have not played it and want to, scroll down to the outro of the article where there will be no more spoilers.


Personal History

I owned this game when I was around 9 or 10, which would have been 1999-2000. VIII had been out for a while and IX just came out but I had no interest in them because all I was playing was VII. At this point, I was still pretty awful at most video games and so never got past Shinra Headquarters. I was sure this was the end of Disc 1. I mean, why wouldn't it be? Shinra was such a looming force by this point in the game, I was sure you'd defeat Shinra and then move on to some unrelated foe later on. Boy, was I wrong. I also had a modded PS1 and since I was too terrible to get farther, I checked data on the modded PS1 that had FMVs from later in the game. I saw the Ropeway going to The Golden Saucer, the Highwind launching only to come down again and, unfortunately for spoiling the complete turning point of the game for me, Aeris' death. These videos blew my mind, as I had only experienced the dark, grimy city-life of Midgar, so to see completely different locations and actually see the sun in some parts blew my mind.

Also unfortunately, at the time, not only was I bad at video games, but I was also reckless with my games, as when I decided to go back and try to get past Shinra Headquarters, my disc was in such bad shape that as soon I would get to the Motorball boss, my disc would lock up. Every single time, without fail. Eventually, I gave away my game and for almost 9 years, I never played it again until I picked it up at a local store for 40 dollars. I finally beat the boss and was blown away that the disc wasn't done and there was so much more to Shinra that just being the corrupt government and more to the world than just Midgar. Now Sephiroth came into the picture and the world was completely different for Cloud and co.

I spent every day and night for months playing the game, making sure I finally beat it. After leaving Midgar, the character development of each person in our party begins growing.

Characters

Cloud Strife

Age: 21

Birthplace: Nibelheim

When we first begin playing as Cloud, he comes off as arrogant and emotionally aloof. He constantly shrugs off (literally) Barrett's pleas to help in the saving of the planet and always ignores Avalanche members Wedge, Biggs and Jessie's friendly ways. We know early in the game that Cloud and Tifa have known each other since they were younger and that Cloud promised Tifa before going off to join Soldier that he'd come to save her if she was ever in trouble.

We're led to believe that Cloud made it into Soldier and only left due to unknown circumstances and this is why he puts up a cocky front, believing himself superior to Barrett and the other Avalanche members, but Cloud is constantly tormented by a voice in his head and whenever near Jenova or Sephiroth, the voice becomes louder. In probably my favourite portion of the game and to me, a bigger twist than Aeris' death, we learn that not only was Cloud never in Soldier, but was never actually very close to Tifa. All of his memories of Soldier, allying with Sephiroth (as told by Cloud to the rest of the crew in Kalm) and helping Tifa in the Nibelheim reactor were the memories of a man named Zack. Cloud was actually a lower level infantry man in Shinra and he became friends with Zack, with both finding they had much in common. They work together on certain missions and during one mission, they come across scientist Hojo, who capture Zack and Cloud and inject them with Jenova cells and exposes them to Mako energy. Since Zack had been through Mako during his training, his body is able to handle it, but Cloud suffers severe Mako poisoning and falls into a vegetive state. Zack breaks them both out and during this time, tells a still poisoned Cloud his life story. Soon, Zack is gunned down and tells Cloud that his legacy will live on inside Cloud. He gives him his Buster Sword and passes away. The Mako poisoning tears Cloud's mind and soon he takes on the memories of Zack, truly believing Zack's life and memories were his own.

When confronted with the truth, this shatters Cloud's perception of reality and he becomes vegetive once again, but with the help of Tifa, he is able to find his true self and recovers. We then find out that the voice inside Cloud's head all along was his true self trying to take over. Cloud then returns to the party a different man. The true Cloud. He is much more emotionally stable and now truly cares for the planet.

Barret Wallace

Age: 35

Birthplace: Corel Village

While we know Barrett is truly a soft man at heart for his daughter Marlene. Barrett is seen most times extremely abrasive and angry, this is because he has seen much corruption in his life and he is constantly fighting an uphill battle against said corruption. Barrett is the leader of eco-terrorist group Avalanche, who go around blowing up the Mako Reactors that have been put around Midgar by Shinra. When the pillars of Midgar in Sector 7 are destroyed, Avalanche members Biggs, Wedge and Jessie are killed and the people of Sector 7's lives are put into jeopardy, including Marlene. Enraged by the loss and terrified about the possible death of his daughter, Barret's reason for living is now to avenge his friends, and make sure his daughter is safe.

When the crew get to Corel, we learn that this is where Barrett is from. We also learn that Marlene was adopted after the apparent death of his best friend, Dyne. The people of Corel do not welcome their hometown boy with open arms, as they cast him as the reason that their once peaceful mining town is now in shambles. While locked in Corel prison, Barrett tells everyone that while still living in Corel, Shinra came to town telling the people how Mako was going to make everything better. Dyne was completely against it but Barrett convinced him that everything would be O.K. and that it would help the struggling Corel. It soon becomes apparent that Shinra wants only to take over the town for themselves and Barrett and Dyne find the town in flames when they return. Amidst the chaos, Barret and Dyne are gunned down, with Barrett trying to save Dyne from falling to his death from a cliff. The Shinra employee Scarlet shoots Barret and Dyne in the arm causing Dyne to fall and Barret's hand to be injured (this now becomes the origin for his gun-arm)

Barrett soon finds out that Dyne is, in fact, still alive and is now not only the leader of Corel Prison, but the reason for them being locked away, wanting to kill Barrett for what he did to Corel. Barrett confronts Dyne on his own and we see that Dyne also has a gun-arm on the side that was shot (Dyne's is on his left arm, while Barrett's is on his right thus showing even more how Barrett and Dyne are linked). Barrett tells him Marlene is O.K. and that he was taking care of her in respect of Dyne, thinking this would change Dyne's mind, as Barett does not wish to find his old friend but Dyne says that he has to kill Marlene so his wife will no longer be lonely. Knowing now that Dyne must be stopped, Barrett bests him and knowing there is nothing left for him to do, Dyne gives the party permission to leave the prison and jumps off the cliff to his final death.

This is really the apex of Barrett's development as a character, as the rest of the story really focuses on Cloud's development, but other things do happen for Barrett's character as in the aftermath of Cloud becoming incapacitated, Barrett (who is now put in charge of the group) realizes that he was never truly fit to lead and gains immense respect for Cloud. Once Cloud is recovered, Barrett tells him that he was always the leader and always the one in charge.

Tifa Lockhart

Age: 20

Birthplace: Nibelheim

Tifa is the owner of 7th Heaven, a bar run in the Sector 7 Slums in Midgar. While she is shown to be upbeat and optimistic most of the times, she has trouble expressing her feelings and so is usually quite shy.

While her backstory and development is not quite as deep as Cloud or Barrett's, her past is still interesting and does make her into the woman we see in the present events of the game. She was the neighbour of Cloud in Nibelheim, but was never truly close to him. As a child, she was outgoing and had many friends, and this outgoing personality helped her land the job of tourist guide for the town. During the events when Sephrioth sets Nibelheim on fire, Tifa finds her father murdered in the Reactor, killed by Sephiroth's sword, the Masamune and swears vengeance on Sephiroth. She tries to attack him, but fails and is attacked herself. She only recovered because her martial arts teacher, Zangan, rescues her and heals her wounds.

When she meets up with Cloud again near the beginning of the game, she notices something off about him as he has memories of things Tifa knows he should know remember. At first, this is not addressed and it is just seen by Tifa as Cloud being different, but when Cloud is incapacitated, it is Tifa who is the one that helps piece Cloud's true memories back together as she is the only one who remembers the true Cloud from their days growing up together.

Aeris Gainsborough

Age: 22

Birthplace: Icicle Inn

Aeris is a flower girl that Cloud meets on the streets of Midgar. At first, this is just a passing meeting, but Cloud, after being ambushed by Shinra soldiers, crashes into a church where he finds Aeris again. The two join up and Aeris soon tells Cloud stories about her boyfriend who was in Soldier just like Cloud. Cloud dismisses her claims as he doesn't remember anyone like the person she's describing in Soldier and Aeris is puzzled and slightly frightened at this and how much Cloud's stories and demeanour remind her of her lost boyfriend. Aeris is always positive and is always the one to cheer up the group. Growing up in the slums, she also has a very street savvy attitude and does not allow others to try and help her, feeling she can handle her own.

Aeris has probably the most complex backstory and her life and subsequent death has the most impact, past and present, on the world in the game. She was born in Icicle Inn to a woman named Ifalna and a scientist named Gast. Ifalna was Cetra, or Ancient, while Gast was human. Wanting to study the Cetra, Hojo and Shinra broke into their home, killing Gast and capturing Ifalna and Aeris. They were subjected to tests, but they were able to escape. Making it to the Sector 7 Train Station, Ifalna collapsed and was aided by a woman named Elmyra who was waiting for her husband to come home from the war. Ifalna dies and realizing her husband has died as well, Elmyra takes Aeris and raises her as her daughter, but as Aeris gets older, Elmyra knows that Shinra will come looking for her and Aeris knows Elmyra is not her true mother, and being Ancient, is able to speak to the planet, with the planet telling her everything.

After Aeris joins Cloud and the others, she is captured after the attack of Sector 7 and they go and rescue her from Shinra Headquarters. It is here that they learn of Aeris' heritage and why she is so important to Shinra, being the last of her kind left alive. Once the crew learns of Sephiroth, Aeris finds out that he is headed for the Promised Land as told by The Cetra. This causes Aeris and Sephiroth's paths to intersect in a tragic way.

They make it to the Temple of The Ancients where they find out that Sephiroth is there searching for something called The Black Materia, which can be used to call Meteor, a weapon so powerful it can destroy the entire planet. Cloud finds it, but Sephiroth uses mind control to have Cloud give it to him and when Aeris goes to stop Cloud, he attacks her. During a dream, Aeris tells Cloud that as the Last of The Ancients, only she can stop Sephiroth. When Cloud awakens, he's told that Aeris is gone and he travels to The Forgotten Capital to find her. It is here that he confronts Sephiroth only for Sephiroth to impale Aeris with the Masamune. Aeris then dies in Cloud's arms, the White Materia that was in the ribbon of her hair falling into the water below.

Even in death, Aeris still shapes the fate of the world, as right before her death, she prayed for Holy to stop Meteor. It is being blocked by Sephiroth. After Sephiroth's death, Meteor is too close for Holy to work, but Aeris' spirit wills it to work, thus saving the planet from demise.


Obviously these are not the only characters in the game, but I felt they had the most importance in the story in terms of playable characters, and while I wanted to talk about Sephiroth, there is way too much to talk about in terms of his backstory that this article will go from an extremely long one to a novel.

Also, I know that Red XIII, Cid Highwind and Cait Sith are important characters in the story but I felt that with Red, while his backstory is extremely interesting and a good part of the game is when you learn about it, Red XIII himself doesn't truly affect anything in the universe or truly with the other characters. Cid's involvement is only really important in a small part of the game and while Cait Sith is very important in a crucial section of the game, I never liked his character, so I chose not to talk about him.

With the two optional characters, Yuffie Kisaragi and Vincent Valentine, they're just that: optional. Getting them in your party or not has makes no difference on the outcome of the game and their backstories are just diversions from the plot. Yuffie's backstory in Wutai is fun, while maybe a little annoying at times and Vincent is probably my favourite character in the game and for an optional character, his backstory is extremely deep and interesting and ends with an amazing twist. But once again, they're optional and so some people may have played the game always with these two or never bothered to get them.

Outro

Whew...This article took a life of it's own faster than I expected. I knew I had a lot to say about the game, but never thought it would be this detailed. I haven't even scracthed the surface of things like the different places in the world, minigames, Chocobo Breeding or the optional Weapons you can face (Emerald, Ruby and Diamond), etc. There's so much to this game but the best part of it to me always has been and always will be the amazing story. If you're looking for a review of gameplay, graphics and such, look elsewhere, this was just me talking about the story and even with how long it is, I haven't come even close to telling the whole story or even a quarter of it. That's for you to experience by playing the game itself.

Even after almost 20 years, this remains, in my opinion, the greatest game ever made. As I stated in the intro, many games have surpassed it in terms of graphics and even other Final Fantasy games have worked out some gameplay issues some may have had with VII, but I have yet to play a game with such an amazing, near perfect story, and I don't think I ever will.


Oh...and I don't care. Aeris' name is and has always been Aeris and not that "Aerith" bullshit. Just putting it out there.